boss?

Its not that I particularly want to be the boss or that I have to be the boss.  Goodness me I don’t even want to have to be right.  Um ok did the control freak just admit that.  Its so strange how our kids tend to change us, I go from an absolute control have to be right freak to “ok monkey its fine.”
 
I try and listen to his point of view as to why he doesn’t want to do a particular thing and decide whether it is necessary to prove I am in control or whether we can let it slide.  However every little victory won by this champion manipulator makes him more determined and strong willed to win the next round no matter how dangerous or not cool it may or may not be.
 
I don’t want to be a parent that doesn’t give my child a choice and then when he is set free at whatever age he is so used to being bullied into submission he has no aptitude for choosing and making the right decisions.  So I do give him a choice, pick up the toys or else.  This sentence gets repeated louder and louder with a change to the threat like “I will smack you, I will put the toys in the cupboard for a week, no iphone for tonight, no movies for a week until I am yelling loudly and about to grab and shake him. 
 
As calmly as possible without shaking shouting and squeezing the blood out of his arms I lift him up and put him in the passage to protect him from myself.  Well he obviously hasn’t realised that the separation is for his protection and for this I am thankful and so as I turn around he bolts past me and runs to pick up the toys.  Being separated from mom is more traumatic than any other punishment for him.
 
Sigh if only I would remember this before I become a raging bull about to try and shake some sense into my child.  Praise God for his mercy that remember and manage to calm down enough to separate us.
 
How do you manage stubbornness in your little one trying to prove they are the boss. 
 

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